F33LINGS GOING NOWHERE
Wednesday, 07 October 2009 18:04 Last Updated on Thursday, 08 October 2009 13:09
EVER SINCE NINTH GRADE IVE HAD FEELINGS FOR THIS GUY THAT I LIK3D ALOT...I MEAN I LIKED THIS GUY SO MUCH THAT IT WAS NEW TO ME AND I COULD NEVER STOP TALKING ABOUT HIM OR THINKING OF HIM.....I F3LL FOR HIM AFTER A WHiL3 BUT H3 STILL DOESNT KNOW....H3'S ALWAYS HAD A GIRLFRI3ND SO I NEVER REALLY HAD A CHANCE WITH HIM...WHICH REALLY GOT ME MAD CUZ I NEVER COULD GET MY CHANCE...I TRIED TO GO WITH OTHER GUYS, BUT IT DIDNT WORK BECAUSE I WOULD GET MAD AT THEM CUZ THEY WERENT LIKE HIM...I WANTED EVERY GUY TO LOOK AT ME THE WAY HE DID...I WANTED EVERY GUY TO TALK TO ME THE WAY HE DID....I WANTED EVERY GUY TO HUG ME THE WAY HE DID...AND I WOULD WANT EVERY GUY TO PLAY THE SAME GAMES ME N HIM PLAYED....I MEAN I KNOW GUYS ARENT SUPPOSED TO TREAT ME THE SAME BUT I WANTED HIM TO LOVE ME THE WAY HE LOVED HIS GIRLS...I WANTED TO BE HIS GIRLFRIEND...AND I WASNT GOING TO TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER....I WAS DETERMINED TO MAKE HIM MINE...AND LOVE HIM THE WAY HE NEEDED TO BE LOVED...I KNW WAT HES BEEN THRU BECAUSE IVE BEEN THROUGH IT TOO..... HE WOULD ALWAYS TELL ME HIS PROBLEMS WITH HIS GIRLFRIENDS...BUT BEING ONLY A FRIEND I HAD TO HELP HIM BUT I WAS ALWAYS LIKE MAN I WOULDNT HAVE DONE THAT TO U....I WOULDVE TOLD HIM THAT I WAS THE ONE THAT REALLY LOVED HIM AND THAT ALL THE GIRLS WERENT ME AND THAT WE HADA SPECIAL LOVE THAT NO ONE COULD EVER COPY OR TAKE AWAY........BUT I WAS HIS BEST FRIEND.... I HAD ALWAYS TOLD HIM I HAD FEELINGS FOR HIM, BUT I NEVER TOLD HIM I LOVED HIM BECAUSE HE WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNOWS WAT I GO THROUGH...I DIDNT WANT TO RISK OUR FRIENDSHIP.... I LIKED HIM MORE THAN ANYONE...I CAN ALWAYS TALK TO HIM ABOUT ANYTHING THAT CAME TO MIND...AND WHEN I SAY ANYTHING I MEAN ANYTHING...IVE ALWAYS HAD BUTTERFLIES AROUND HIM AND I WAS ALWAYS NERVOUS TO BE AROUND HIM BECAUSE I NEVER KNEW WAT HE WAS GOING TO SAY OR DO AROUND ME.....EVENTUALLY IN MY 10TH GRADE YEAR WE KISSED 2 TIMES...IT WASNT REALLY AN ACCIDENT CUZ WE BOTH WANTED IT...I COULD TELL HE WANTED KISS THE WAY HE LOOKED AT ME BUT I DIDNT MENTION ANYTHING ABOUT IT TO HIM....I THOUGHT HE WOULD FREAK OUT ME....I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN WE KISSED CUZ I GOT WHAT I WANTED (WELL SORTA) BUT HE STILL HAD A GIRLFRIEND AND I COULDNT DO ANYTHING MORE WITH HIM...WHICH REALLY HURT ME...CUZ I CAN NEVER GET OVER HIM... THE WAY HE LOOKED AT ME I COULDNT GET OVER IT...AT NIGHT I WOULD STAY UP AND THINK OF HOW IT COULD BE IF WE WENT OUT, I MADE UP SO MANY FANTASIES AND DAYDREAMS ABOUT HIM....BUT IN THE END IT WOULD NEVER WORK BECAUSE I DIDNT KNOW HOW HE FELT ABOUT ME......DURING THE SUMMER I WAS TALKING TO ANOTHER GUY TRYING TO GET OVER HIM BECAUSE I KNEW NOTHING WAS EVER GOING TO HAPPENI WANTED TO BE WITH HIM BUT NOT BEING WITH HIM HURTED ME ENOUGH I WANTED TO GET OVER HIM TO SEE HOW IT WOULD GO.......BUT WEN I TOLD HIM HE TOLD ME HE DIDNT LIKE THE OTHER GUY AND THAT I CAN DO BETTER....I KNEW I CAN DO BETTER BUT HE WAS TAKIN SO I COULDNT DO ANYTHING BUT HOPEFULLY WAIT...BUT WEN I WAS TALKING TO THAT GUY ALL SUMMER I WOULD THINK OF HIM...HE WAS ON MY MIND THE WHOLE TIME.....BY THE TIME SKOOL STARTD I TOLD HIM THAT IT DIDNT WORK OUT WITH THE GUY AND HE STILL TOLD ME HE DIDNT LIKE HIM BUT I WAS LIKE OH WELL...HE TOLD ME HE HAD FEELINGS FOR ME AND I WAS SO HAPPY...BUT HE STILL HAD A GIRLFRIEND SO I STILL COULDNT DO NOTHING BUT LET MY HEART BREAK INTO A THOUSAND PIECES...IT WAS GOOD NEWS TO HEAR BUT IT BROKE ME...THAT NIGHT WHEN I WENT HOME I CRIED AND CRIED AND CRIED...I COULDNT STOP OR EVEN THINK OF SOMETHING THAT WASNT INVOLVING HIM.....I STILL HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS FOR HIM CUZ HE WAS THE ONLY ONE I REALLY LOVED.... BUT NOW HE'S IN LOVE WITH HIS GIRLAND I KNEW HE WAS HAPPY....I DONT WANT TO RUIN HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HER BECAUSE I DIDNT WANT TO HURT HIM...SO I KNEW I HAD TO MOVE ON SO NOW IM WITH SOME ONE IM REALLY HAPPY WITH BUT SINCE HE STILL GOES TO MY SCHOOL AND I HAVE CLASSES WITH HIM IS HARD NOT TO THINK ABOUT HIM....EVERY TIME HE SEES ME HE'LL SMILE THAT CUTE LITTLE SMILE THAT I LOVE AND WAVE AND SAY HI TO ME...IT KILLS ME WEN HE SMILES BUT IM TRYING TO STAY FOCUSED ON THE OTHER GUY CUZ I LIKE HIM ALOT ....MAYBE HE WILL BE THE ONE I WILL FALL IN LOVE WITH....BUT MAYBE IN THE FUTURE OUR TIME WILL COME.....MY FEELINGS RITE NOW ARE GOING NOWHERE
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written by Guy16, April 14, 2010
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written by sweetNINgirl67, October 17, 2009
thats rough. I know it's difficult, especially when you are clearly so much in love with him. But it doesn't sound like he's going to leave his girlfriend anytime soon. Thats incredibly rough.
You sound like a really sweet caring person. Obviously you are attractive to a lot of guys. While so far these guys have not compared to THE guy, it really shouldn't be long until you find someone who makes you forget entirely about him. You clearly think he is the best guy ever but there are others who are fantastic, who you might try giving a chance. Someday you will find that one to blow your mind so to speak.
If it turns out you guys should be together, and it sounds like you really believe it, I guess you'll have to have some patience. Sorry I'm not so good with advice ... but when we're young we're so impatient, we want everything right away. I've learnt pretty fast that these things take time. Whatever happens with you two, it'll be for the best.
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written by speaking my mind, October 11, 2009
i guess what I'm trying to say is take that risk, you don't want to waste your life just fantasizing about this guy, the only way you will ever confirm you feelings for him is if you tell him how you feel. If he rejects you, sob for a few days and then move on. I understand you don't want to risk your friendship but if you really feel that way, then there is no other choice. Plus if he did kiss you, then that must mean he felt something in return.
If anything try to bring up that day again, and see what he thought about it. If he was truly in love with his girlfriend he wouldn't have done what he did. If he is acting like this it probably means he is insecure with his current relationship and he is coming to you as something on the side. He's trying to have his cake and eat it too. If you really do feel that way abotu him I say make that move, and tell him how you feel.
and if in the end it doesn't work out to your favour, I say screw him and move on.
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written by dreamboy, October 11, 2009
when i am 6th grade i dreamed to have a person who's good in drawing and good in playing softball..
i love you _ _ _ _ _ _
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written by ricky_g18, October 09, 2009
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